Some of you probably recognize Burg as the co-author of The Go-Giver, but this one is all his and according to the author, his finest work – the book he was meant to write.

Burg starts out by introducing us to the idea of Ultimate Influence ==>the ability to get the results you want from others while making them feel genuinely good about themselves, about the process, and about you.

Burg suggests that Ultimate Influence is based on five key principles that occur on an ongoing basis.  In this post, the third of four, we will take a deeper look into the third and fourth principles (3) Acknowledge Their Ego and (4) Set The Proper Frame.  Take a look at these and see if any of them might apply to your life.

3. Acknowledge Their Ego

• Don’t Shame or Embarrass – Never criticize or condemn publicly.  Always seek to build up and encourage!  Ultimate Influencers build trust and empower others.
• Be a Judge, Not a Lawyer 
• The Principle of Agreement – Avoid using the word “but” because in most cases, it eliminates what you just agreed to.
• Ego Repair
• The Power of Handwritten Notes – Remember the wisdom of John Maxwell; “People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.” What are you doing to tell others that you care?
• Edification – a Powerful Key To Influence
• Do You Look for Disagreement? – Respond before you react.  Set yourself up for success and find the things you can agree on before the things you can’t.
• Compliment the Uncomplimented
• Caught in the Act! … of Doing Something Right – This is one of my favorites. How often do you catch someone in the act of doing something right – and then recognize them for it?
• “I Appreciate Ya” – When was the last time someone told you they appreciated you?  When was the last time you told someone else?

4. Set The Proper Frame

• Positive Expectation Works, but Not Why You Think It Does – Simply stated, you get what you expect.  No it doesn’t always work but when you believe in a positive outcome instead of a negative one, you will be much more successful.
• Framing Your Influence in Your First Conversation – First impressions, right? Simply make the conversation revolve around the other person and you set the tone for everything that follows.
• Sometimes’ It’s Good to Let ‘Em See You Sweat
• The Ransburger Pivot
• The Value of the Correct Phrase
• “What Can I do to Help?”
• Win by Making the Other’s Case First – Understanding and accepting the fact the the other person has their own thoughts and ideas, and believes them to be true, puts you in the position to control the outcome.
• Help Them to Live in the Solution – The best way to create an alliance is to bring a solution.  Wanting to solve the problem indicates your attitude of working towards a solution – no matter who comes up with it.
• Avoid Negative Framing
• Don’t Fall Victim to the Either/Or
• Persuasion Secrets of a Ten-Year-Old
• Change Your Frame, Change Your Life – Want allies?  Turn negatives into positives.  No it’s not easy, but staying in the negative will never solve anything.

Well, there is a taste of the thoughts and ideas found within this book.  I encourage you to pick up a copy and fill in the stuff I left blank on your own.  Some of the chapter headings listed above don’t make a lot of sense until you listen to Burg’s wisdom.  Now is your chance!

We certainly have much more to look at in Adversaries Into Allies but understand that people generally believe they are right because their beliefs are based on the experiences they have had.  Right or wrong, until you recognize that they believe what they believe, you will find it difficult to persuade them otherwise.  So ask yourself this question – Is it really worth the fight or is working together going to provide a better outcome?”  Win-Win outcomes are OK!

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Barry Smith   1/3/14   photo courtesy of burg.com   © Building What Matters 2014

The post Adversaries Into Allies – Part 3; Motivation and Outcome appeared first on BUILDING WHAT MATTERS.COM.

Some of you probably recognize Burg as the co-author of The Go-Giver, but this one is all his and according to the author, his finest work – the book he was meant to write.

Burg starts out by introducing us to the idea of Ultimate Influence ==>the ability to get the results you want from others while making them feel genuinely good about themselves, about the process, and about you.

Burg suggests that Ultimate Influence is based on five key principles that occur on an ongoing basis.  In this post, the second of four, we will take a deeper look into the first two principles (1) Control Your Emotions and (2) Understand the Clash of Belief Systems.  Take a look at these and see if any of them might apply to your life.

1.  CONTROL YOUR OWN EMOTIONS

• Responding Versus Reacting – I love this one!  Responding is how you stay in control.  React, and you are letting the other person control the outcome.  How is that working out?
• Effectively Handle Verbal Attacks
• Make Calm Your Default Setting – What if you could actually accomplish this? Have you ever noticed that when they get louder, so do you?  It does work in reverse – when was the last time you tried that?
• Overcome Anger
• The Persuasive Power of Positive Detachment
• Think Before You Speak
• Agree to Disagree – What would the world be like if everyone thought the same and agreed on everything?  Sometimes agreeing to disagree is the best way forward.
• Consider the Source

2.  UNDERSTAND THE CLASH OF BELIEF SYSTEMS

• Belief Systems – the Problems and the Solution – There is some great insight here. People’s beliefs are created largely due to what they have experienced in their life. Expecting someone to agree with you, just because you think you are right, is like expecting them to abandon everything they have ever known.
• “How Would You Define …?”
• Accept the Responsibility for Communication
• The Importance of Conscious Awareness – You know that I am a big awareness fan.  When you are consciously aware, you can use all the information you have to create and communicate a thought.  Isn’t that a better option that what you “have always done or said?”
• Personal or Not?  How Do You Know?
• Love Languages from Liberty the Cat
• First, Know the Issue.  Then, Choose the Words
• The Answer?  Based on What Information? – Better the question, better the answer right?  It works the same when making decisions.  Better the information, better the answer.  Have you ever tried to complete a puzzle without all the pieces?
• Perceptual Realities Equal Different Conclusions
• Change Your Non-Serving Beliefs to Be More Productive

Well, there is a taste of the thoughts and ideas found within this book.  I encourage you to pick up a copy and fill in the stuff I left blank on your own.  Some of the chapter headings listed above don’t make a lot of sense until you listen to Burg’s wisdom.  Now is your chance!

We certainly have much more to look at in Adversaries Into Allies but let me leave you with this question today; “If you stayed in control and recognized that other people can believe what you believe, but simply think about it a little differently, that it might just make sense to work with them instead of against them?”  Just a thought!

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Barry Smith   12/12/13   photo courtesy of burg.com   © Building What Matters 2013

The post Adversaries Into Allies – Part 2; Staying In Control appeared first on BUILDING WHAT MATTERS.COM.

Some of you probably recognize Burg as the co-author of The Go-Giver, but this one is all his and according to the author, his finest work – the book he was meant to write.

Burg starts out by introducing us to the idea of Ultimate Influence ==> the ability to get the results you want from others while making them feel genuinely good about themselves, about the process, and about you.  You get that little piece of wisdom on the first page of the introduction.  So far, it only get’s better from there.

Burg suggests that Ultimate Influence is based on five key principles that occur on an ongoing basis.  Over the next three weeks I will break these down further but here is the list to get you thinking in the right direction.

1.  Control Your Own Emotions

I have been reading a lot about “control” recently and I have to agree with Burg on this. Staying in control will always yield better and more lasting results.  Our emotions push us to reacting instead of responding.  Who would you rather have creating your future – you or the other person?  Want results?  Take control!

2.  Understand the Clash of Belief Systems

As the author puts it; “Each one of us sees the world in a unique way based on a combination of upbringing, environment, schooling, popular media, and the people with whom we associate.”  I love this idea.  One of my mentors tells me all the time; “Hang around people that believe what you believe, but think different thoughts.”  I think Burg is adding clarity to that statement.  It’s not only the idea that people think differently, it’s also about how to process those differences in a productive “collaborative” way.

3.  Acknowledge their Ego

This is good stuff.  At the end of the day, no matter how much we are willing to give of ourselves and serve others, we still feel good one when someone acknowledges what we have done.  It’s simply human nature.  Unfortunately, some place too much focus on it.  But Burg’s point is clear – if you want to persuade someone to your way of thinking, part of your plan better include some type of positive recognition of the way they are thinking.

4.  Set the Proper Frame

Why is it that we choose to set ourselves up for failure when is most cases, with the right choices, we can set ourselves up for success?  Burg suggests that we have the power to set the proper frame.  It doesn’t matter if we moved first or the other person did.  What matters is our last move.  Why?  Because that is what sets the frame for the next move.  You are always one move away from success or one away from failure.  [Tweet Now]

5.  Communicate with Tact and Empathy

Burg makes the observation that; “Communicating tactfully displays a genuine regard for the other person, which will open the door to making him your ally.” Do first impressions matter?  Hello!  Think about the last time someone approached you and let’s just say “lacked a little tact” in the way they communicated.  How did that make you feel? Look, people want to feel valued and they want to matter.  Words matter and they matter a lot.  Use them wisely.  You never know when you might need an ally.

It’s hard to beat Burg’s take that pretty much frames out the rest of this series … “You’ll see that when you begin to control your emotions, consider others’ points of view and ego, create a positive atmosphere, and communicate tactfully and with empathy, you will get what you want in your personal interactions and relationships.”

We certainly have much more to look at in Adversaries Into Allies but let me leave you with this question today; “Which provides a better outcome – when they’re with you or when they’re against you?”

***********************************************************************

Click here to get a copy of my Kindle Book “The Manifesto Of An Influential Leader”

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Barry Smith   12/4/13   photo courtesy of burg.com   © Building What Matters 2013

The post Adversaries Into Allies – Part 1; Ultimate Influence appeared first on BUILDING WHAT MATTERS.COM.

I do not find any coincidence in the fact that I started reading “The In-Between – Embracing the Tension Between Now and the Next Big Thing” by Jeff Goins on the very same day.

An added value that Goins has offered with the launch of his new book is what he calls the “Slow Down Challenge.”  If you have been following me for a while, you know I usually do a book review post on Wednesday.  I am going to throw a little twist into that for the next week.

This will be the first of five posts following Goins Slow Down Challenge.  Here is the lineup that will take us through my next five posts:

• Day 1 – The Habit of Noticing
• Day 2 – Savoring Every Moment
• Day 3 – Focusing On What Really Matters
• Day 4 – Interruptions
• Day 5 – Gratitude

The reason I am doing this is simple.  Goins has hit the nail on the head for what I think almost everyone one of us goes through every day.  We are so consumed by that “next big thing” that we fail to enjoy the moment.  In fact, I would suggest that most of us don’t even realize that we are in the moment.  We are fixated on the destination and completely ignore the journey.

Last month I posted a few times while my son Spencer and I went on a marathon road trip that encompassed 3,700 miles in 9 days.  Now you might think that sort of schedule would go totally against what this post is about.  Not so fast my friend!

Here is why.  Every day we hit the road, we had a destination.  But during the journey, the destination was the last thing on our mind.  We stopped at viewpoints.  We stopped at road signs.  We stopped in the middle of the highway just to look at something cool or take a few pictures.  We even stopped at a closed nuclear museum and spent almost an hour just looking around on the outside.

We had no real game plan other that to figure it out along the way.  The key is this, we were intentionally noticing the things around us.  I didn’t really think about it at the time, but it was the unplanned things on that trip that will be my lasting memories.

The moose that ran across the highway going over the continental divide.  The grand canyon of Yellowstone that we almost didn’t stop at because we had never heard of it. A really cool museum that we had all to ourselves in “the middle of nowhere,” North Dakota.  Have you ever been the only ones in a museum other than the curator?

Here is the action plan from Day 1 of the Slow Down Challenge:

Spend at least 15 minutes going for a walk – around the block, around the yard, or even around the office.  As you do so, try the following:

• Look around (if you’re the praying type, ask for eyes to see).
• Take note of whatever catches your eye; concentrate on it.
• When you get back, write down what you saw.
• As you go through your day, revisit your list.  Remember what you noticed and say a quick thank-you for each item.

So my challenge for today, if you have not already guessed; “SLOW DOWN AND TAKE THE TIME TO NOTICE WHAT YOU’RE MISSING!”

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Barry Smith    8/30/13   photo courtesy of a colleague   © Building What Matters 2013

The post DAY 1: Taking The Time To Notice What You’re Missing appeared first on BUILDING WHAT MATTERS.COM.

His third book, The Mentor Leader, unlocks the concept of leadership much more than Quiet Strength or his second book, Uncommon, had done previously.  Make no mistake, they are all worth the read, but The Mentor Leader brings it all home.

The subtitle, secrets to building people and teams that win consistently. says it all. Mentor Leadership is about building people and when you do that, success is sure to follow.

I will break the book’s nine chapters into three posts.  The first will discuss the Mandate, Mind-set and Maturity of a mentor leader.  The second will cover the Marks, Moments and Model of a mentor leader and the final will address the Means, Methods and Measure or a mentor leader.

THE MEANS OF A MENTOR LEADER: MAXIMIZING TEAM PERFORMANCE

“The secret is to work less as individuals and more as a team.  As a coach, I play not my eleven best, but my best eleven.”  –  Knute Rockne

• Mentor Leaders create a culture.
• Mentor Leaders understand that diversity enhances excellence.
• Mentor Leaders promote togetherness.  This keeps the team moving forward.
• Mentor Leaders lead volunteers for extraordinary achievement.

When mentoring, it is important to focus on strengths.  None of us are capable, or required to “do it all.”  Build your team by building the best of what each individual has to offer.

THE METHODS OF A MENTOR LEADER: THE SEVEN E’S OF ENHANCING POTENTIAL

“Blessed is the leader who seeks the best for those he serves.”

• Mentor Leaders promote Engagement.
• Mentor Leaders encourage further Education.
• Mentor Leaders emphasize the need for Equipping.
• Mentor Leaders Encourage no matter what the circumstances.
• Mentor Leaders seek to Empower others.
• Mentor Leaders Energize their tribe.
• Mentor Leaders Elevate others to a higher level.

The best way to enhance potential is to build the individual.  How many of these E’s are you providing in the lives of the people around you?

THE MEASURE OF A MENTOR LEADER: BUILDING OTHER LIVES OF IMPACT

“Start right where you are, with the people right around you, doing something as simple as engaging with them and talking.”

• Mentor Leaders recognize it about the journey, not the destination.  They add value every moment.
• Mentor Leaders share the journey with the entire team.
• Mentor Leaders finish strong and live a life of significance.

Whether we recognize it or not, we would all like to leave a legacy of significance. There is no better way to do this that to help others build theirs.

Coach Dungy has done a clear and concise job of explaining how important it is to both be a mentor and be mentored.  Everyone has a skill set and there is no greater gift that to believe in another person and help them achieve what they want in life.

Make a difference today and share what you know with someone and help them become more than they thought possible.

• To see part one of The Mentor Leader click here
• To see part two of The Mentor Leader click here

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Barry Smith    7/17/13   photo by amazon   © Building What Matters 2013

The post The Mentor Leader – Part 3: Means, Methods And Measure appeared first on BUILDING WHAT MATTERS.COM.

As my translator Anai and I entered our transport vehicle this morning, the driver told us we would be headed to a record store and sure enough, after about 30 minutes, we arrived at Casa Instrumental.

We walked into the office area above the showroom to await our coordinator and I honestly was unsure who we were to be training today.  Our coordinator greeted us and directed us out a back door.

What came next was the last thing I expected.  We entered the instrument academy.  The most amazing school for music I have ever seen.  We saw individual rooms for every kind of instrument.  Sound rooms with more electronics that I had ever seen in one place and décor so full of color and life that it made you feel like you were on a movie set.

We soon found out that we would be training teachers, managers and human resource staff at the most prestigious instrumental music academy in Guatemala.

The theme followed much like yesterday.  High engagement and high emotion.  The response was similar as well.  An incredible need for mentoring and leadership with everyone we worked with.

Some of the participants were hesitant to partake in the interactive part of our training.  With a little encouragement, they finally made it to the front of the class.  I asked them when we were done if they had been scared?  Yes.  Did they learn something about themselves?  Yes.  Were they glad they did it?  Absolutely!

Again, with an absolutely incredible job of translation by Anai, we witnessed transformation right before our eyes.  Several participants approached us afterwards to thank us and shared a unified new attitude of achievement.  “We will do this.  We will change our Country.  We will not let you down.”

I explained to them that their focus needed to be not to let themselves down.  Not to let their families, friends and co-workers down.  They understood what I was saying.

After the training session, we were able to tour some more of the facility and found out that the Guatemalan version of American Idol was filmed at this location in their auditorium.  We were actually able to see some of the contestants practicing for the taping next week that will be aired on local television.

It has added so much to this experience to see the environment that the locals live in every day.  Part of me will remain with the people of this Country forever.  The images etched in my mind will not be forgotten, nor will the lives we have seen changed.

Our team dinner tonight, was again filled with great stories of change and a soccer ball signed by the entire team that was presented to John.  “I will put this in my office where I can see it every day to remind me of the greatest leadership week in my life,” John stated as he held the ball in his hands.  He added that this week has been an “outward experience resulting in an inward journey.”  I couldn’t agree more.

Tomorrow, we train in the morning, followed by a stadium event with attendance predicted in the thousands celebrating transformation.  That will be followed by an event outside of the City which we are told is one of the most beautiful places in Guatemala.

We do it one more time tomorrow.  It will be difficult to sleep tonight knowing that the world will change again for so many once again tomorrow and that I will be blessed to be part of it.

“La Transformación está en mí.”

• Click here to read Day 1
• Click here to read Day 2
• Click here to read Day 3
• Click here to read Day 4
• Click here to read Day 5

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Barry Smith    6/14/13   photo by author  © Building What Matters 2013

The post Guatemala – An Outward Experience For An Inward Journey appeared first on BUILDING WHAT MATTERS.COM.

The truth is I don’t know how to explain it.  How do you explain something that you have never done that made you feel like you’ve never felt in a place you’ve never been with people you’ve never met?

Today I realized what significance really means.  Lives were changed today, including mine.

For about three and a half hours, I trained on laws of growth and personal values with the objective of training about 35 leaders that have committed to bring these ideas and skills to hundreds more.

My only worry going into this first session was that I would be able to connect with these people that did not understand the language I speak.  I could not have asked for a more capable and passionate translator.  When I met Anai this morning, I immediately was put to ease.

Anai, a twenty one year old college student who lives just outside of Guatemala City, told me she wants to get her masters degree in language translation in Chicago and then return home so that she can help support her family.  That was all I really needed to hear.

She was amazing.  Somehow, we moved through the material like we had been practicing together for a long time.  I found it interesting how much different communication is when you have to depend so much more on body language to connect with your audience.

Have you ever had the complete attention of someone you are speaking to even though you know they don’t understand a word you are saying?  Let me tell you, it is extremely powerful!

Our preparation time paid off and I know that those future agents of change not only understand the responsibility they have as leaders now, but also that the hope, or ESPERANZA, of transformation in Guatemala is now reality.  I heard so many amazing stories from my colleagues, many of them describing adversity that was overcome during the process.

Failure was not an option for us today, and I honestly believe this Country will refuse to fail as well.  The outside world has showed up and believed in them and they now believe in themselves.  They will do this.

We finished up with cheers of “La Transformación está en mí.”  Everyone in that room left a different person than when they arrived.  I believe this is the beginning of something much bigger than what will be accomplished this week.

Upon returning back to the hotel, we found ourselves in the company of several of the orphans that we had brought gifts for.  No words can describe the light in the faces of these kids as they took turns selecting from the mountains of crayons, stuffed animals and coloring books.

The picture is of me with some of my new friends.  These boys were some that traveled four hours to be here today.  How was your day?

We finished up the day with a team review of the events of the day.  More amazing stories shared by some of my teammates.  Then John Maxwell stepped to the podium.  You could see and feel the emotion within him as he told us that today was one of his finest moments.  The feedback already received included a request by President Pérez Molina asking John to train his entire cabinet.

This was the one, however, that brought everyone to their feet.  “Once you get a taste of significance, you will never settle for success.”  Today we were significant.  Today, Hope or “Esperanza” is no longer what might change this country.  It is what WILL change it.  Tomorrow, we do it again.  Can’t wait!

• Click here to read Day 1
• Click here to read Day 2
• Click here to read Day 3
• Click here to read Day 4

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Barry Smith    6/13/13   photo by author  © Building What Matters 2013

The post Guatemala – The Word Of The Day “ESPERANZA” appeared first on BUILDING WHAT MATTERS.COM.

Today was the first day that we had the opportunity to really connect with the local residents that are helping out.  This morning we finalized the training we will be doing and then spent the second half of the morning with our translators.

It was quite the site to see over 150 local translators enter our room to a standing ovation.  The local residents and Government have done nothing but show us an immense amount of gratitude and appreciation since we arrived.  It was our turn to show our appreciation.

You could see the emotion in their faces as we honored them for their efforts and willingness to give of themselves in this massive effort.  As we paired up and began to go over the procedure for coordinating the same message in two languages, we could not help but inquire into their story.  What brought them into this process?

As you can imagine, they all had different stories that brought them “into the room” this morning.  These volunteers ranged from professional translators to 17 year old high school students that have been prepping for this huge task for weeks.

I was surprised at how well almost all of them spoke English and the young man, Rodrigo Hernandez, that I connected with was no different.  Rodrigo is a 23 year old college student studying to be a surgeon.  He has been translating at his church for a few months and works at a call center at one of the local telecommunication businesses.

I listened intently as he shared the journey that put us together.  His mother, also a translator,  has been translating for several years and I wish you could have seen the look on her face as I told her how impressed I was with her son.

I found it very interesting that the common theme amid these bi-lingual partners was not that they were concerned about translating our words, but translating our emotion.  I understood immediately as Rodrigo described what life has been like for him growing up in Guatemala.

This country is so incredibly passionate about the potential change about to take place and the next three days. I believe it will be unlike anything most of us have experienced before.  I won’t pretend to know what it has been like for the people we will be speaking to but they will know that I believe in them and in their cause to change a Nation.  They will know that as well before I head home later this week.

The day ended with an eye-opening trip across town to the Presidential Palace.  About 400 people, including our team, gathered to hear from Guatemalan President Otto Pérez Molina, Guatemala Próspera President Manuel Espina and John Maxwell.  The atmosphere was intense as a picture of transformation of a Country was painted by these three men.

We were able to view a good portion of the palace and the rich history of this Country only reinforced our desire to make a difference.  It was almost surreal, at least for me, to be an acknowledged guest to such a momentous occasion.

This day is engrained in my memory for several different reasons but I think something the President Pérez Molina said put everything in perspective for us.  He closed his speech by making the following statement; “The best way we can say thank you is to show you the transformation.”

Take a minute and think about that statement coming from the President of Guatemala.  He wants to say thanks to us by improving his Country.  That is what I call leadership!

• Click here to read Day 1
• Click here to read Day 2
• Click here to read Day 3

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Barry Smith    6/12/13   photo by author  © Building What Matters 2013

The post Guatemala – Yesterday Ended At Midnight, Today Is A New Day! appeared first on BUILDING WHAT MATTERS.COM.

There are varying philosophies on the idea of friendship at work.  Some feel that there is no place for it in a professional environment and others thinks that everyone should be friends.

What do I think?  I think it depends on what you intend on doing with the friendship.  I will admit, I have been the instigator of the March Madness bracket at the office.  It’s not my fault they play the Thursday and Friday games during work hours.

The last few years, I got a little smarter, I talked the owner into filling out his bracket. Now if I could figure out how to have him win … never mind!

Filling out basketball brackets together will certainly build some comradery between co-workers but there is something much larger at play here.  We simply need friends at work.

Most people spend more time at work then they do at home.  What often happens is that the pressures and stress of our job get to us during the day and then we unload at home.  Bad plan!

I think if we had better relationships with our co-workers, we would be much better managers of the stressful stuff.  How do most people define a friend?  Someone I can talk to that will listen.  Someone I can depend on when I need them.  Someone who will help me out when I am in a jam.  Do these descriptions sound like someone you could use at work every once and a while?

Think about something else.  If you have been at you current job very long, the people you work with know you pretty well.  Do you think that might come in handy?

Here is what I think is important.  Building relationships at work is good.  Building friendships is even better.  The key is to know when it’s appropriate to be a friend or when it should be strictly business.

My advice to owners and managers; encourage the idea friendships in the workplace. This is a support staff for your people.  That being said, make the guidelines clear on what is acceptable and what is not and allow the employees to police themselves unless you see a major issue with time management.  Remember, happy employees are productive employees.

My advice to employees; do not abuse the latitude you have been given.  Your friendship time, whatever that may look like, should have a desired outcome to benefit the company.  Even if that benefit is simply your attitude adjustment.

My advice to everyone; you need people in your corner to support and encourage you. You also need to be that person every once and a while.  Whatever relationships you have at work, make respect and trust a big part of them.  Develop relationships to add value, not to gossip or exclude others.

“Treasure your relationships, not your possessions.”  –  Anthony J.  D’Angelo

I think D’Angelo is right.  I don’t think we can truly enjoy what we do if we don’t enjoy those that we do it with.  You might have the greatest job in the world, but if you don’t get to enjoy with anyone, how satisfied will you be?

Have you ever heard of someone turning down more money to go elsewhere because they liked where they were at?  Sure you have.  I will bet you the reason they stayed was because of the people they were working with.

So as you begin the next work day, consider this question; “If I could work with any group of people, who would they be?”  Just something to think about.

Oh and by the way, if you like working with someone … when was the last time you told them that?  … Thought so!  Might want to add that to your to-do list.

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Barry Smith www.buildingwhatmatters.com 4/21/13 photo by author

The post Friendship In The Workplace – It’s More Than Just Having Fun! appeared first on BUILDING WHAT MATTERS.COM.

In section one, Pink discusses what he calls the “Rebirth of a Salesman.”  In section two, discussed in this post, Pink provides a new twist to the ABC’s of selling which historically has stood for Always Be Closing, by discussing Attunement, Buoyancy and Clarity.  In section three, he discusses the way we should be selling in today’s environment – The Pitch, How to Improvise and How to Serve.

Pink provides his three essential qualities needed to move others.  The new ABC’s of selling.

PART TWO – HOW TO BE

4.  ATTUNEMENT

Pink discusses the idea of Attunement.  In other words, when we are faced with a complex or challenging situation involving other people, how do we make sense of what’s going on?  Do we simply try and understand it from our own point of view or, as Pink states, “Do we have the capability to step outside our own experience and imagine the emotions, perceptions, and motivations of another?”

Pink suggests that the greater knowledge and confidence we have related to any specific subject, decreases our innate ability to see the point of view of the other person and that it takes a cognitive awareness to get out of our own way to see the world from another’s perspective.  Do you think this might help in selling?

5.  BUOYANCY

Pink defines buoyancy as “How to stay afloat amid that ocean of rejection when attempting to move others.”  He gives the three components of staying afloat.

BEFORE – Pink references Napoleon Hill’s idea of autosuggestion from Think and Grow Rich. In short, he says we need to “Tell ourselves we can do it.”  Pink found that those who practiced this technique were more successful than those who did not.

DURING – Pink found that customers and clients that heard “the positive-inflected pitch were twice as likely to accept the deal as those who had heard a negative one.”  In other words, when making the same pitch, the one focused on the positive benefits of the sale were more successful than those focused on what will happen if you didn’t buy.

AFTER – Pink states that “People who give up easily, who become helpless even in situations where they actually can do something, explain bad events as permanent, pervasive and personal.”  They basically believe that negative conditions will remain over time.  On the other hand, approaching “NO” as a temporary condition allowed them to keep their options open.

6.  CLARITY

Pink asserts that “Good salespeople are skilled problem solvers.  They can assess prospects’ needs, analyze their predicaments, and deliver the optimal solutions.”  He goes on to say that “the ability to move others hinges less on problem solving than on problem finding.”  The real power in selling comes from the ability to identify the problem.  After all, you can’t solve a problem unless you can clearly identify it.

The old ABC’s of selling  (Always Be Closing) was focused on the person selling.  The new ABC’s (Attunement, Buoyancy and Clarity) are focused on connecting with the client or customer.

Regardless of what business you are in, you need to be in tune with your client, you need to excel in the face of adversity and be clear on what the desired outcome is.

So as you move forward today are you simply trying to move someone through the next door or are you focused on getting them all the way out of the building?

Next week we will take a look at Part 3 – “What To Do”

To Read Part One of “To Sell Is Human” click here

Find out more about Daniel Pink and “To Sell Is Human” at  www.danpink.com

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Barry Smith   www.buildingwhatmatters.com   3/6/13            photo courtesy of Amazon

The post To Sell Is Human – Part 2, How To Be appeared first on BUILDING WHAT MATTERS.COM.